Erotic Adult Vacation

The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"
"Why?"
"Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere."

Women's opinion of us (in some cases).....

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An irate wife was complaining about her husband spending all his time at the pub, so one night he took her along with him.

"What'll ya have?" he asked.

"Oh, I don't know. The same as you I suppose," she replied.

So the husband ordered a couple of Jack Daniel's and threw his "down the hatch" in one go.

His wife watched him, then took a sip from her glass and immediately spat it out.

"Yuck, it's Bloody AWFUL!" she spluttered. "I don't know how you can drink this stuff!"

"Well, there you go," cried the husband. "And YOU thought I was out enjoying myself every night!"

ONLY A GRANDMOTHER WOULD KNOW...~A Cup of Tea ~

One day my Gramma was out, and my Grampa was in charge of me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old. Someone had given me a little 'tea set' as a gift, and it was one of my favorite toys.

Grampa was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I brought him a little cup of 'tea', which was just water. After several cups of tea and lots of praise for such yummy tea, my Gramma came home.

My Grampa made her wait in the living room to watch me bring him a cup of tea, because it was 'just the cutest thing!' Gramma waited, and sure enough, here I came down the hall with a cup of tea for Grampa, and she watched him drink it up.

Then she said, (as only a gramma would know), "'Did it ever occur to you that the only place she can reach to get water is the toilet?"


IF YOU SEND THIS ON, YOU CAN MAKE ANOTHER GRANDPARENT, AND MAYBE A FUTURE GRANDPARENT, SMILE.

Two friends met. "You look sad, Doug, what's the trouble?" asked the first.
"Domestic trouble."
"But you always bragged that your wife is a pearl."
"She still is. It's the mother-of-pearl that makes all the trouble."

Marriage is a ceremony that turns your dreamboat into a barge.
- Marriage is a mutual relationship if both parties know when to be mute.
- Marriage is a rest period between romances.
- Marriage is a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
- Marriage is a trip between Niagara Falls and Reno.
- Marriage is an institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
- Marriage is better when both the husband and wife decide that what they have is better than what they are missing.
- Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
- Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
- Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are trying to get out.
- Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.
- Marriage is mind over matter; if the husband doesn't mind, it doesn't matter...
- Marriage is not a word; it is a sentence.
- Marriage is the high sea for which no compass has yet been invented.
- Marriage is the mourning after the knot before.
- Marriage is the only sport in which the trapped animal has to buy the license.
- Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.
- Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of person your spouse would have really preferred.
- Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
- Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.